My dream!!!

Today was my 2nd day of training for our new system that jetblue will be using coming the end of January. Instead of working my shifts from home I'm in training for 2 weeks mon - friday ugh. but at least I get home at 8:30 instead of getting off at 10:30 from my normal shift. So I can see my boys before they fall asleep. I never knew how hard it would be to go back to work. This time is so much harder than the other times going back to work after maternity leave maybe cause I have three now and I have less time to spend with each one individually. I really had an emotional week when I went back a few weeks ago I seriously cried my self to sleep because I missed them so much. This is why we never go on trips without our kids I would seriously have issues I would miss them way too much. I felt like I was the worst mother ever because I couldn't spend time with them. I have to say I totally take back all the days that they begged me to play with them and I kept putting them off because i was cleaning or doing something else. I took time for grantite and thought we can always play later and then later came to nursing the baby and then making lunch and then making dinner and then doing homework and then doing more cleanup. So now that I don't have all the time of the day to play with them I definitely make the time now and toss the dishes a side I can always clean later but my kids will not be little forever.

My dream is I wish we could just get paid to be a mom....but yes that is just a dream and as Susan boyle sings "there are dreams that cannot be".